This step might be as hard as the first step or it might be easier. It always depends on the person. Another factor of coming out is whether or not someone will accept you. That was my main fact when coming out. Most people try to find the perfect person to tell that they know will accept them for being themselves. For my case, I believed that my best friend at the time was the perfect person to come out to. When coming out for the very first time it could be nerve wreaking. It is a secret that many keep to themselves until it either it comes out by accident or the person tells someone. Everyone coming out story is different and never the same. For certain people it is no surprise of them being LGBT, whereas for other people it can come as a shock to those who are informed.
In my case, many where shocked to hear the fact that I was indeed not straight. I did get many times the saying that it is just a phase and that I will get over it. As I said before for each person coming it could be completely different. You can listen to thousands coming out stories and take away certain strategies/tips, but there is never just one way of coming out. The biggest to remember is to let someone come out at their own pace and never force them to tell you their sexuality.
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| On October 11th every year it is National Coming Out Day. |
Here are a few of my favorite coming out videos. They really explain the thought process behind figuring yourself out and coming out. These videos are quite relatable if you are going through and when through the coming out process.
I find it interesting how you were told "it was just a phase" as a queer woman ; women are more openly accepted as having fluid sexual orientations. In society, it seems like "it's normal" for women to "experiment", but some people are somehow under the impression that similar men do not exist. I applaud you for coming out and it's unfortunate your friend wasn't so loyal!
ReplyDeleteIt was very strange yet I did not really mind. Those who told me it's just a phase were just concerned for my sake. They fully accept me now, it just took them a bit of time. That friend was just concerned for my sake. I have forgiven her since we were both 13 at that time.
DeleteThe funny thing to me is that "coming out" seems to many as something you do only once...except when you are a part of the LGBTQ community, you come to realize that you will continue coming out for the rest of your life. I've heard many LGBTQ people say they don't want to or don't feel the need to come out, but personally I see coming out as an opportunity for awareness, as well as a resistance to the heteronormativity. Everybody is assumed to be straight and cisgender until told otherwise, and I want to challenge that.
ReplyDeleteI somewhat come out everyday since the day it went public. I do it either by just taking about girls with my friends or by mentioning the fact that I have a girlfriend. Nobody really realizes that coming out is a daily thing and even i don't notice since it's a natural thing for me.
DeleteWow this is really something, coming from someone who has never even given this sort of thing a second thought this post has been a real eye opener for me on what many people have/will go through. AWE Connor's and Troye's stories are the sweetest!Great post :)
ReplyDeleteThank you very much! Many people who either aren't close to someone who had to come out, went through it themselves or done some research do not know how it could be difficult. I made this blog to educate others on the things that the LGBT community and I have to go through. Troye and Connor's stories really well said and shows the bigger picture, hence me using it.
DeleteEmily i must say, this post will help so many people! It could potentially help me aswell, perhaps not in the sexual orientation way, but some tips here act as life tips. For example, in your first paragraph where the first step is to come out to yourself before telling others, this shows that you need to not care about what others think and worry about yourself first. Great blog Emily!
ReplyDeleteThank you very much. It is great to hear that you might take some of my tips and use them in your own life. It is very important to accept and love yourself before others do. A life where you care about what others think is not fully living. This blog is to give information and help others who may not be as comfortable in their own skin.
DeleteI watched the videos that you posted along with this post, and they are great examples and proof of what you are talking about. This post is very informative, and you did an amazing job of writing it. Great work! Keep it up!
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